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My father had a favorite saying when I was growing up that I can’t publish in a family newspaper.
Let’s just say that anytime my brother and I were complaining, my father’s fictional kitty and its milk would always get the message across. However, it was always followed by a groan or two from me or my brother.
It was corny. And I guess that’s why it’s stuck in my mind all these years. (It’s not one I use with my own children; I use another corny line from my mother.)
So in keeping with those pearls of wisdom – corny or not so corny – by dads everywhere, we asked readers to share their favorites.
Margie Merriman of Preble
“When us kids were growing up and my dad wanted to make a point and not have us forget what he told us, he would say, ‘Now mark that behind your ears.’ ”
Linda Wunderlin of Fort Wayne
“My dad used to say, ‘You’re really funny … lookin’.’ … When someone asks my husband what something is, say a rock (he’s a science teacher), he’ll say ‘a leaverite … a leave ’er right there.’ ”
Mary Hostetler of Wolf Lake
“My dad, Russell Carson, was the kindest, gentle spirited man I ever knew or will know. I never saw him angry. If he was upset with something or things didn’t go well, he would say, ‘Oh, rats.’ I wish I would have inherited his gentleness.”
Gail Gerber of Fort Wayne
“My dad’s name is Jack Rhoades. He says, ‘If you see me in the airport, don’t say “Hi, Jack.” ’ ”
Gwen Gephart of Fort Wayne
“My dad is Russell ‘J.R.’ Rhoades of South Whitley, and he is almost 86 years old. One of his favorite lines, which has always helped us through some ‘challenges,’ is, ‘As long as no one is dead, nothing is so bad it can’t be fixed!’ ”
Denise Fredrick of Churubusco
“These two funny lines were often quoted by my father, Donald Richard Jones, to his four daughters over the years: ‘Let your grub stop your mouth, as Clara Fortman used to say.’ (We never did know if there was a real Clara Fortman, but we would stop talking and start eating.) His other funny saying was, ‘Keep your mouth closed and let everyone think you are stupid, don’t open it up and prove it.’
“Also, my 82-year-old mother remembers the two sayings that her father, Charles Peter Fink, told his seven kids, and to this day, she still quotes them to her four daughters and her grandkids: ‘If a job is once begun, never leave it ’til its done. Be the task, great or small, do it well or not at all,’ and ‘Things that you do, do with your might. For things done half is never done right.’ ”
Charity Gudakunst
of Churubusco
“When we were kids (my three brothers and I), our dad would take us out to eat. He could eat much faster than us and would be helping himself to our french fries before we knew it. And when we would complain that he was eating all of our fries before we got to them, he would reply, ‘I could bury you in french fries.’ And to this day, my brothers and I eat our french fries first, and laugh about how dad would say that he could bury us in them.”
Susan Garboden of Goshen
“My parents Blaine and Phyllis Fulton live in Berne. He has many nuggets of corny wisdom; however, I will choose the one which I think Dad repeats the most often, and that is, ‘Always tell the truth and be kind to your mother.’ … Dad has always told me and my siblings how lucky he is to have married my mother. He tolerated a lot of mischief from his five children, but he did not tolerate any signs of disrespect toward our mother.”
Julie DeVille
of Fort Wayne
“When my dad wanted us to be quiet, … he’d always say, ‘Quat!’ My sisters and I would always laugh at that. I never heard anyone else’s parents ever say that word, just my dad.”
Katie Gravatt
of Leo-Cedarville
“My dad will occasionally and randomly look in the mirror and say, ‘Oh my gosh, it happened again!’ and nothing more. Immediately my mom, my brother or myself will respond with, ‘What?’, to which Mr. Super Corny, aka my dad, will respond with, ‘I got better looking.’ I can’t remember how many times I’ve heard this or fallen for the same darn joke.”
Shiloh Reed
of Fort Wayne
“My dad (David Reed) had a saying, ‘The grass may be greener on the other side, but it’s just as hard to mow.’ ”
Jeff Deming
of Napoleon, Ohio
“I have four daughters. My oldest will be 25 … my youngest 11. The most popular line in our house was always, ‘I’m smiling, but I’m serious!’ Many times when it came time to correct them, I just could not keep a straight face. I think that line was recently in a movie, and I also included it in a recent song I wrote.”
Terry Holston
of Fort Wayne
“Many moons ago when I was a kid, we lived on a farm just south of Albion. All my dad’s relatives lived in Kalamazoo, Mich., and we used to drive up there to visit every couple of months. This was before the interstate highways so we had to take the long and winding road that went past little towns and such. We always passed this one old car junkyard; my dad would always say, ‘Must be a ballgame today, look at all the cars!’ Then he would bust out laughing. When I had kids of my own, being the dad, I used to tell my kids the same thing every time we went past a junkyard. To this day they still remember that; when we are together and go past a junkyard, they yell out, ‘There must be a ballgame today, look at all the cars!’ Of course all bust out laughing also.”
Leslie Chalfant
of Fort Wayne
“On (a) family trip, my parents and my brother and I were all talking, and Dad was trying to describe how happy someone was or how happy something made him when he uttered, ‘… happy as a pig in a Cavalier.’ To this day we tease him as we’ve no idea where that came from.”
Tom Hensinger
of Fort Wayne
“When my father saw that I was angry or upset about something, he would say, ‘Don’t go away mad, just go away.’ This would make me angrier. When I got older and married with (a) child, I found this is really good advice. When we are in heated arguments, time, distance and perspective gives you time to think clearly. … My father-in-law has many lines I enjoy. Since I am pushing 50 years old and sometimes comment on an ache or pain, he often tells me, ‘You’re in great shape for the condition you are in.’ ”
Sandy Rhoads
of Fort Wayne
“My dad would always say and still does, ‘Waste not, want not.’ Whether it was to get us to finish all the food on our plates, or keeping ‘stuff’ around because you never know when you might need it, we could always count on hearing that phrase.”
Marcia Zeigler
of Churubusco
“Here is one my dad, Billy Espich, always used regarding gossip, ‘I’m six months behind on my business so when I get caught up, I will worry about everyone else’s.’ ”
Rex Kock
of Huntertown
“One of Dad’s favorite lines when I was growing up was, ‘Use that thing on your shoulders for something other than a hat rack!’ Translated (it) means, use your head; think!”
Tim Waikel
of Fort Wayne
“… Whenever I would be working on a project or even making something to eat, he would sometimes tell me to, ‘Stop gomming around.’ … One that really stuck with me and I find myself saying to my kids when they’re playing during the wintertime and coming in and out of the house, is ‘In or out, we’re not heating the outside.’ I learned from the best, Dad.”
Becky Torres
of Fremont
“Anytime I say, ‘Hey!,’ he responds with, ‘Wheat is cheaper.’ He’s quite the joker.”
Alison Metzger
of Fort Wayne
“When we would go to the pool as kids, my dad would say, ‘Don’t get wet!’ ”
Angela Shepherd
of Huntertown
“My dad, Richard Ferckel, loved to eat out all the time. After my sisters and I all moved out, Mom and Dad would call us up to go out to eat or to meet for coffee. Most the time we would. He always insisted on paying. A lot of the times he would say, ‘I’m spending your inheritance.’ We wouldn’t trade those times for any amount of money.”
Lauren Klosowski
of Fort Wayne
“My dad’s corniest line, ‘I’m funnier than two people.’ And I still don’t get what it means.”
Melissa Dyben
of Fort Wayne
“I had a phrase come back to me a few weeks ago from my childhood. My 5-year-old, John, was pouting about not getting a toy or something and I told him – just as my dad told me over and over – ‘If you stick that lip out any further … a bird will come along and poop on it!’ That would usually make me laugh and I would shape my act up. I will say the same for my little boy; he started laughing at the thought of that happening! I took the moment to share with him that this is what my daddy used to say to me.”
Don Schmidt
of Fort Wayne
“With regards to healthful eating habits, my father, Donald B. Schmidt, who owned a plumbing and heating business in Logansport, would use the analogy: ‘The amount of BTUs out of the boiler depends on the quality of the fuel you put in.’ He also would say, with regards to getting along with people: ‘A person needs a good “forgetter” to get along in this world.’ ”
Thomas Davis
of Coldwater, Mich.
“I was reading in your paper this morning about the request to send in quotes from our fathers – serious and not so serious. I couldn’t help but think about something my dad always said (and still says at age 79!) to me when I started to do work. This applied to work around the house, at school and at a ‘real job’ as well. I currently live near my folks after living away from them for the last 30 years and sure enough, my dad says it to me every time he happens to see me leave for work: ‘Tommy, don’t forget to put your name on it!’ Implying that in some way I sign my name to every task I complete that day so the whole world would know that it was I who did it. I know now his desire was that I would then do my very best work at all times.
“Currently I manage a restaurant in Auburn that has a high proportion of young people on its staff. I will admit over the years I have been guilty of criticizing the subsequent generations for paying more attention to their cell phones/computers and TV than to working, etc. I must say now that I was wrong in my assumption, that quite a few of the kids working with me today seem to have that same drive to ‘put their name on it’ that my dad tried to instill in me.
“It makes me feel good to see that desire to do good work and serve others is still alive and well in this world today.”
T. James LaBorde
of Fort Wayne
“The two bits of advice from my father that have always stuck with me are: ‘The worst thing that can happen to a person is to outlive his money!’ and ‘If you don’t want the hole to get any deeper, stop digging!’ ”
Tammy Driskill
of Decatur
“If my mom was upset or down in the dumps about anything, my dad would comb all his hair straight up in the air, and in his undershirt and boxers would ask from a crouched position, ‘Do I look like the wild man of Borneo?’ After I grew up and realized he had been in Leyte Gulf and Mindanao during WWII, I found there actually is a nomenclature ‘wild man’ and have even seen statues for sale in catalogs.”
Phyllis Doty
of Fort Wayne
“Talk about trusting everything your dad completely told you! His famous last remark when he dropped you off was, ‘If you get there first you make a chalk mark; if I get there first, I’ll erase it.’ ”
Vaunetta Barnhill
of Fort Wayne
“My father gave two good pieces of advice, ‘Never do anything for money you would not do for free,’ and ‘Forget perfect – do your best and remember they crucified the last perfect person.’ ”
Sue Lester
of Fort Wayne
“Ever since I can remember (father) always told me that ‘God brings people, places and things in your life for a reason.’ I have lived by this advice all my life. …”
Marlene Ellsworth
of Fort Wayne
“When our family went out to eat a meal, Dad would always say, ‘The best is none too good for the Ellsworths.’ He was upholding our self-esteem and telling us not to look too hard at the right side of the menu. But he confesses that the line isn’t original with him – it comes from a comic strip that was popular back in the ’20s or ’30s.”
