You know that barrel of monkeys you're always hearing about?
New England Patriots tight end Rob Gronkowski owns a condo there.
The guy's a free spirit who likes to have his fun, which would be fine and dandy if he played for anyone other than the Patriots, the most personality-averse organization in football. The Patriots make Mitt Romney look like Jack Black. They make the Queen of England look like Lady Gaga. If they had an official team fabric, it would be tweed.
So no surprise that they've asked Gronkowski -- who, unlike some of his other football brethren, hasn't done anything illegal in the offseason, only slightly wacky -- to put a lid on it. Time to tone it down, Gronk. Be more serious. Quit that doggone smiling.
These are the Patriots, after all. Take that frown that you turned upside down and put it back where it belongs.
And wear more beige, doggone it.