You've gotta give Melky Cabrera his props. This is way, way better than "The dog ate my homework."
Not everyone would devise such an elaborate ruse to evade the MLB drug police. A phony website? Touting a phony nutritional supplement that, hey, guess what, accounted for Cabrera showing red on his last drug test?
Whew. Can't imagine, in these entrepreneurial times, that someone won't try to cash in on this the way Billy Carter cashed in with Billy Beer.
Introducing .... Melky Milk! The nutritional supplement Melky Cabrera would have come up with if he'd actually thought this through! Packed with carbohydrates, B-vitamins and a patented Secret Ingredient (wink-wink) to provide that little extra somethin'-somethin'!
Brothers and sisters, Melky Milk goes down so smooth you'll swear you just imagined drinking it! And you'll be right!