The best of recent jokes by late-night comedians:
Chuck Hagel is the new secretary of defense nominee. They are saying that he may be reluctant to send troops into a war zone needlessly. What kind of a nut job is this guy?
Al-Jazeera has purchased Al Gore’s old TV network, Current TV. So it’s now owned by Al-Jazeera. And listen to this: $500 million. This is a little something Al Gore has come up with called global fleecing.’
Tickets to President Obama’s inauguration have sold out. At least that’s what the president is telling Joe Biden.
Secretary of State Hillary Clinton returned to work today and as a joke, her staff gave her a helmet. This is the second time a Clinton in government has been asked to wear protection.
Joe Biden and his wife left D.C. this weekend for a five-day vacation in the Caribbean. Of course, most of that time will be spent telling him that Margaritaville isn’t a real place.
Today, members of the 113th Congress were sworn in at the Capitol. After which, they were like, Well, that’s enough work for the year.’
This week, Congress approved some version of the fiscal tax bill, which raises taxes on rich Americans. President Obama was determined to do this right away – while there are still some rich Americans left.
Chris Christie also lashed out at Congress for doing nothing for the victims of Hurricane Sandy. But in their defense, Congress says, Hey, we don’t do anything for anybody.’