Last month, over 200,000 jobs were created in the United States. And that doesn’t count this one.
President Obama invited the U.S. Olympic team to the White House yesterday to congratulate them on their performance in Sochi. Of course it got awkward when Biden told the biathletes, I won’t rest until all you guys can get married.’
The No. 1 movie this weekend was Captain America: The Winter Soldier,’ which has already made $303 million at the worldwide box office. So in other words, Captain America has more money than regular America.
Last night was the big premiere of Game of Thrones.’ So many people watched it that HBO’s website crashed. And as a result the website’s been renamed HBO-bamacare.
A couple in Michigan is being sued for $2 million after they burned down their apartment complex trying to cook a squirrel with a blowtorch. I’m not an accountant, but it sounds like they might not have $2 million.
Police in San Francisco are looking for a group of vandals who have been tipping smart cars over. Well, they’re assuming it’s vandals. It could have just been a stiff breeze.
Al Sharpton responded to accusations that he served as an FBI informant, saying, I was not and am not a rat. I’m a cat. I chase rats.’ He added, I was not an informant on a boat, I was not an informant on a goat, I was not an informant in the rain, I was not an informant on a train.’
In England, a movie theater had to cancel a showing of Noah’ due to a flood in the movie theatre. Either that or the 3-D in that theater is really good.